Oh Little Boy Singers…

I think I’m in a writing mood.

Speaking of epidemics, I have to acknowledge Justin Bieber. This boy has exploded into the music scene. Really. I don’t know about you, but it took me by surprise.

His debut single, One Time, was released in 2009. And his album, My World, (which went platinum) was the first ever to have 7 songs from a debut album to be in the Billboard Top 100 (according to Wikipedia. So you know it’s true).

sidenote: Did you know that Justin Bieber is from Ontario, Canada? I had no idea.

So I know a lot of people have some passionate dislike for Justin. But I think a lot of people underestimate his talent as well. He reminds me of a male version of Jojo. She is actually a really good singer. But I don’t think she got all the credit she deserved and was categorized as some goofy teenage singer, just as Justin Bieber is categorized by many. So, yeah, I like him and I like Jojo. They should collaborate, though she’s like 19 now.

Anyways, I was chatting on aim with my friend, Clifton, the other night. By the way, it should be noted that Clifton is not a fan of Justin. And he sent me a link to a youtube video and said “and I thought Justin Bieber was bad”.

Watch it. Please.

Now, first of all. COME ON. This is blatant imitation Justin Bieber (like imitation crab). Just because Justin Bieber has had huge success doesn’t mean you can just throw any 15 year old boy, with flowy blonde hair who can sing a little tune, into the scene. This is too much. I’m sorry Cody Simpson, but it’s just not gonna work out.

Second of all, iYiYi as the name of the song? What? Bad choice. Flo Rida… I just lost a little bit of respect for you. I have an analogy for this: As Cody Simpson is to Justin Bieber, Flo Rida is to Ludacris.

Not only is this song kind of sub-par, but the music video just totally throws me off. I don’t know if I can pinpoint it. Maybe it’s the pink hoodie, or the bicycle gang concept, or the “143 ” text in the beginning of the video or the sad dance moves… It makes me want to kind of cry and throw up at the same time. iYiYi.

I forced myself to rewatch this video a few times so that I can have an accurate perspective for this post. Stupid mere exposure effect… the song is almost starting to sound alright. Now it makes me only want to throw up.

Dreamstreet. YEAH

So I was thinking about these young boy singers and I remembered Dreamstreet. Do you remember these guys??

They came into existence in 1999. I think this was basically their only big hit. Listen to the chorus at least, I’m pretty sure it’ll sound familiar to you.

But yeah, these kids… they look like they’re 12. This music video is fantastic with the great hair and outfits and dance moves. So good. If you didn’t know, Jesse McCartney was in Dreamstreet.

I watched this Dreamstreet video and Jesse McCartney’s, more recent, Leavin’ video back to back. HUGE difference. The Leavin’ video is just straight up racy… I bet that music video took $50 to make. Youtube it.

Other boybands

My train of thought was:

Cody Simpson -> Justin Bieber -> JoJo -> Cody Simpson -> Dreamstreet -> THEN…

Hanson.

Remember them? no? MMMBOP. Very catchy song.

[sidenote: MMMBOP, iYiYi, what's up with all these song titles that are not real words? This is one of the leading causes of illiteracy in America. I don't know how I feel about this, but it's not good.]

I listen to MMMBOP every once in awhile. Here’s the song to jog your memory:

By the way, the MMMBOP music video probably cost less to make than Jesse McCartney’s Leavin’ video. I used to enjoy them back in my younger years. I remember people used to make fun of them because of their hair, and then I thought of the Jonas Brothers.

WOW right? The Jonas Brothers are basically a present day form of Hanson. A band of 3 brothers who girls seem to love, but they are also the butt of many jokes. I’m right, right? Interesting.

I wonder what the Hanson brothers look like now. You know what, I’ll just show you the before and after.

10 years makes a big difference, no?

So yes, whether you like it or not, it seems as if these young male singers are here to stay. Once one of them fades out, another appears like magic. Except Cody is probably going to fade faster than most. tear.

Luckily, I have a short poem written for this occasion:

Oh little boy singers…
whose tunes are set as pre teens’ ringers.
You have offered us much G-rated lyric
of which my comments are quite satiric,
I just hope you retain your singing abilities
long after you have reached puberty.
Sincerely, Me.

I utilized www.rhymezone.com to help me rhyme my words. (P.S. Nothing rhymes with puberty.)

“You’re…sort of beautiful”

I thought it would only be appropriate for me to address an epidemic that has been sweeping the nation, and even the world. I am positive that everyone in America is aware of it. Except maybe the Amish.

And it is probably one of the most controversial topics of this time. No, not healthcare policy or BP (jerks). There is one word that will promise to evoke either a sense of excitement or loathing inside of you… Twilight.

YUP, I said it. Actually I was watching tv last night and Twilight actors were featured on The Late Show, The Tonight Show, and Oprah… at the same time. You either love it or hate it. And if you hate it, it is most likely because of its obsessed fans who exclaim that “You just don’t understand.” Which you don’t. But it’s alright. To each his own, right? And I think it is appropriate for me to share my experience.

Now, I have to admit, I have never read the books. But I have seen all the movies. I saw the first movie on a whim on opening night, thinking it would be a joke. And it was. But it was, above all, entertaining. The plot was interesting, fresh (because at this point there were virtually no vampire movies/tv shows). Sure, there were terribly corny lines that made me feel uncomfortable, but it was all a part of the experience. It was actually pretty funny as well.

Then the second movie came out: New Moon. I waited awhile before I saw this one. But I knew I had to see it. The buzz surrounding New Moon was about the transformed Jacob (Taylor Lautner). Short hair, bigger muscles, no shirt. Yeah, that is pretty much a recipe for teenage admiration. I saw the second movie. Much better than the first. More action, more face time for Jabob, lines that were a bit more believable, and I thought better acting as well.

Now by this time, I have gotten very interested in the story and kind of just swept up a little in the hysteria of it all. So when my friend, Kai brought up the idea of seeing Eclipse at midnight, I of course agreed. Eclipse was great fun. Better than the first two. I won’t spoil it for the rest of you. So I’ll just recommend that you see it. I’ll go with you if you want.

Here’s the extended trailer for Eclipse:

It’s not that I find these movies to be top quality or the stories to be amazing and thought provoking, but rather, just entertainment. You know, people criticize Twilight a lot without realizing that most people just see it as entertainment. What’s wrong with that? The majority of people do not stalk the actors and wait days and days to catch a glimpse of them…

(this is not my picture. i was not there. i promise.)

But if you do that, it’s totally cool. Don’t get me wrong. I can see how people get hysteric about it.

But I mean it’s similar to the way people react to their favorite sports stars or singers (aka Justin Bieber). I would say the talk I have heard about Lebron and Twilight has been about even lately.

It’s actually kind of nice because now that I have seen the Twilight saga movies, I can discuss it with other people. It’s a nice conversation starter.

“Sooo are you team Edward or team Jacob?”

By the way, I like Carlisle (Peter Facinelli). He’s a cool dude. And he is hilarious in the show Nurse Jackie.

But if I had to choose Edward or Jacob, it would hands down have to be Jacob. And it’s not just his perfect abs. I promise. Both Edward and Jacob are attractive men. The whole vampire thing kind of creeps me out a little I think. I’ll just use that as my excuse.

So I was reading an article about Taylor Lautner (Jacob) in the July issue of GQ (current issue). It was really interesting. He talked about how he got to this point and how he had to bulk up 30 lbs of muscle to keep his role in the second Twilight movie. And how even though he’s hugely popular, his home life is the same. Still takes out the garbage, still mows the lawn. He likes to eat at Olive Garden. He seems like a guy that would be cool to hang out with (shirt on).

(Sorry, I had to include a picture of him. This is from a 2009 issue of GQ.)

Of course, if he is on the cover of GQ, they have to have a photoshoot of him. And seeing as how his shirtless scenes in the movies draw the loudest reaction from fans, he has to have one shirtless picture.

Taylor’s GQ pictures

sidenote: The 4th picture is kind of awkward I thought. It doesn’t look like his arm. And the 8th one is pretty sweet too.

The shirtless picture is the 3rd one. (I did not want to put the actual picture on here. My blog is not for ogling and lusting, but for speculation purposes only. hehe) Anyways, I saw this picture and I thought…dang. How did they pitch this idea without sounding ridiculous?

“Hey Taylor, take your shirt off now. Lay on your side and drink this water. It’s actually Ice Mountain, but we have to remove the label. Lets see the abs more. Make the water look sexy in this nice back lighting.” And voila.

That’s how I imagine it went down.

Some people have been complaining that there shouldn’t be a “teeny bopper” on the cover of GQ. You know what I have to say about that? boo hoo. What is wrong with having a young, fit, trendy guy on the cover? Take it easy. There’ll be a new issue out next month.

So if you have gotten swept up in the Twilight craze, rest assured, you are not alone. And if you have jumped on the anti-Twilight bandwagon, you should join the craze. I won’t judge you. (As long as you are not Team Edward. yuck.)